the ramblings of a hopeful romantic pt 2 — lessons in love



Love … is a mysterious thing. At least for me. It’s not simple. Not easy to understand. Not … easy.

You see many definitions today, from people who claim to know what love really is. But they all seem to fall short, to miss the mark.

What is love?

This question pounding in my heart’s rhythm. I want to marry someday. I really do. But I know that, first, I need to understand what love really means, what “true love” is. Is it being there for them on a bad day? Is it that feeling when he holds you in his arms? Is it always seeing the good in them? Is it making him a sandwich, even if I don’t feel like it? 😉

God loved me at my darkest (Romans 5:6-8). This is something that I can’t comprehend. But yet, it is seriously the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard. Not “you’re so pretty”. Not “you have a great personality”. He loved me at my darkest. Think about that.


In today’s society, where love is defined as fireworks and red roses and diamond rings, sometimes I forget what love really is. As cliche as this might sound, love isn’t just there with the feelings, and the sunshine, and the good times. Love isn’t a valentine’s card, or a summer fling. Love isn’t just there when a person is lovable, when they say all the right things, when they do all the right things, when they say they’ll love you forever.

Love is a commitment — a choice — to put someone’s needs over ours, to sacrifice our comfort, ourselves, for them. Even when they don’t deserve it.

I see this in the movie Frozen, when Ana sacrificed her chance to live in order to save her sister, even though her sister hurt her.

I see this in Tangled, when Eugene sacrificed his only means to live for Rapunzel.

I see this in the book of Hosea, when God called him to marry a prostitute, and even though she ran away from him to go back to her old life, three times, Hosea pursued her and brought her back. Even though she forsook him, betrayed him, and probably hurt him, he still demonstrated Christ-like love.

And, to me, it seems like this kind of love stands out. Not the fast, cheap, flaky, Hollywood kind of love.

But the kind of love that Jesus has shown to me, and the church, His Bride. No matter how many times I fail Him, He still loves me, and I don’t understand why. I just … can’t wrap my mind around it.

His love never fails. Never gives up. Never runs out on me.

Even though I don’t deserve it.


a forever kind of love…


What is true, deep, lasting, satisfying… love?

Every girl has this desire to love and be loved, to be swept off her feet, to be fought for and won and treasured by a handsome prince.

We can shrug it off or ignore it but no matter if we try to deny it….it’s true.

And it’s a God-given desire. Because just like woman was taken from the side of man, she longs to be restored to the side of man, where she was made to be, where she belongs.

So we grow up watching Disney Princess movies and Barbie and beg our mothers to, oh, please, read that story again and again about that pretty princess and the dragon and the true love’s first kiss.

But do we know, I mean, really, know what true love is? You know, the Christ-like, unconditional, never failing, all-consuming, forever…kind of love?

True love requires something that hard for all of us.


And this woman, named Robin, knew how to show that love to her husband.

Especially during a hard time early in their marriage.

<p><a href=”″>Bret & Robin Graham</a> from <a href=””>Crossroads Christian Church</a> on <a href=””>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>